Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers!

I have a feeling there is a lack of readership. I know some of you poke in every now and again to check things out, but I wish more of you would leave comments, letting me know you're still coming. I will press on, but it'd be nice to know people are actually reading what I'm writing.

On to football!

Home team in CAPS

KANSAS CITY over Seattle
No Shaun Alexander, no Matt Hasselbeck. KC has been really tough to beat at home this year, even though today we heard that Damon Huard may not be playing, I still think KC will win this one.

CHICAGO over San Francisco
The 49ers should leave their heart, and everything else back home, because the Bears are coming off of a bye, and they will be ready to kick some ass at home.

NEW ORLEANS over Baltimore
Baltimore's offense has been horrid, and the Saints are playing at home again, where they keep finding a way to win.

Houston over TENNESSEE
Houston has been a tough pick this year, but David Carr has been awesome. I think the Titans will compete at home, but the Texans will win this one.

GREEN BAY over Arizona
The Cardinals shouldn't have fired their offensive coordinator, as they only scored 9 points against Philip last week. The Packers are tough at home, sort of, and I think they'll win a close one.

NEW YORK GIANTS over Tampa Bay
The Giants looked great last Monday, and Tampa has been lucky the past 2 weeks. This will end this week in NY.

Atlanta over CINCINNATI
Cincy has kind of fallen off of the ship, and it's fun to watch all of their players get arrested. I think the Falcons will keep rolling.

PHILADELPHIA over Jacksonville
Byron Leftwich is NOT the right QB for the Jags, and Philly has had 3 really bad weeks, losing in the last minute of each week while being ahead.

SAN DIEGO over St. Louis
The loss of Merriman will hurt the Chargers, but LDT and Phil Rivers will prevail on turf. St. Louis has been over-rated, and they will start to fall off.

Pittsburgh over OAKLAND
Oakland winning last week was a fluke, they're going to get pounded this week, Roethlisberger or no Roethlisberger. I didn't look that up, I mean it.

Indianapolis over DENVER
This will be a close one, but I think Indy will score more touchdowns this week than Denver has given up all season(2). Mile High is a tough place to play, but Peyton finds ways to win.

New York Jets over CLEVELAND
This is one of those weird games that looks like it's gonna suck while watching. I definitley think so.

CAROLINA over Dallas
Dallas is a weak team, and like I said last week, they've been beating up on weaker teams. The Giants proved it last week, and Carolina will deflate the Cowboys a little more this week.

Ah, what the hell. MINNESOTA over New England.

And there you have it.
Last Week: 7-6
Season: 67-34

Yeah, so what? You wanna fight about it?

So, I've had all of my doctor and dentist appointments this week, seeing as how I haven't been to either in at least 2 years. Teeth are good, neck is horrible, and I'm obese. Yeah, so what. I've taken steps, and will continue to take steps to remain - get - healthy. My blood pressure isn't bad, and my blood sugar is fine, which means I'm not getting diabetes. I have to wait for my cholesterol test, but it won't be long. Speaking of that, I passed out giving blood. Very weird. I gave blood in high school and passed out, and this time I didn't even watch or feel a thing, but I felt the needle come out, and it was like letting the air out of a balloon. Regardless, at least I went, and know what's going on inside me - to a degree.

As far as bowling goes tonight, we won all 7 points, which rocks. I bowled okay, not well. I started with a 202, then had a 173, but finished with a 132. I won a buck off of my brother too, because be bowled a 131. Haha.

This weekend Holly and I are going to a party in the sticks thrown by some good friends. It should be a great time, I'm really excited for it. For tomorrow, we have some friends coming over, but I should still be able to put out the football picks, so, keep an eye out.

Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.' Peter, those are Cheerios.

Sorry for not posting the picks yesterday. Holly and I went to a freinds house and hung out, and ended up staying late, and I didn't have time to write. But it's not like you were relying on me for this weeks picks...right?

If anyone paid attention to last weeks picks, I got 6 picks wrong by 25 points. If you eliminate the ATL NYG game, that number goes down to 5 incorrect by 12 points. That's an average of LESS than 3 points a game. Vegas must have been rolling in it last week. Those games could have swung either way, and I felt the brunt of it. Regardless, this week looks a bit easier.

Home team in caps.

San Diego over KANSAS CITY
The Damon Huard train has to derail sometime. Oh wait, that happened last week. Look for this to be a repeat performance.

Jacksonville over HOUSTON
If you look at all of the stats associated with this game the Jags should have the ball around 40-45 minutes this game, and Houston shouldn't get the ball more than 4 times.

CINCINNATI over Carolina
Everyone is picking the Panthers, because they are starting to come around with Steve Smith back in the lineup. But I don't feel like they'll pull it out. This is going to be a close one.

NEW YORK JETS over Detroit
John Kitna on the road? Hahahahahahaha.

Green Bay over MIAMI
I hate the Packers, but I'm trying to improve my record. Joey Harrington is Miami's option for survival?

New England over BUFFALO
I think the Pats will be looking for a little revenge after their previous meeting - that and they're finally running on most of their cylinders.

Philadelphia over TAMPA BAY
The Bucs got lucky last week, on a couple of bogus calls. This won't happen against the Iggles.

Pittsburgh over ATLANTA
I think the Falcons are on a downward swing, and the Steelers are coming up. This might be a little lopsided.

Denver over CLEVELAND
Cleveland sucks, denver has only given up 1 touchdown this year.

Arizona over PHILLIP
Arizona proved something last week, but I don't know if it will carry over this week. They might overlook the Raiders, but I don't think they can lose this game.

SEATTLE over Minnesota
The Seahawks home crowd is LOUD. I think that in itself will be a lot to overcome, besides their potent offense, with or without Shaun Alexander. I don't think the Vikes can score enough points to keep up.

INDIANAPOLIS over Washington
Indy has only lost 6 or so games in the past 3 years at home. Washington will struggle to keep up with Peyton and co.

New York Giants over DALLAS
EVERYONE is picking Dallas. But I definitley don't agree. Dallas has beat up on weak teams, while the Giants have played some good competition. I think Eli squeeks this one out.

Last Week: 7-6
Season: 60-28

And there you have it.

Dad, what's the point of this story? I like stories.

I apologize for not posting anything in the past week, but it's kind of tough to post anything with a Vikings bye week. Yes, that's a horrible excuse, but it's the truth. I really didn't have anything to write about - until now.

There are two things I want to cover before I get into my regular Thursday night post. One, because most of you who read this are fairly young and starting out your lives, I thought this was interesting for all of us. You should all read this.

Secondly, a new bill was signed into law this past week, and most of you probably already know, but the president essentially eliminated habeus corpus. Which basically means anyone - terrorist, U.S. Citizen, 4 year old - can be detained, tortured, interrogated, and kept imprisoned without legal aid, and without cause, for as long as desired by those who have done the arrest. I don't know about you, but this is not cool. I am all for a conservative government, and I feel our current administration has done an okay job, up until the past few months. However, everything our forefathers fought for and established our nation on has basically been thrown in the trash. I believe congress is out of touch, they are all a bunch of upper class know it alls, who believe they are working in the best interest of us, a nation made of middle class citizens. How is this possible? I would think that the supreme court would step in and rule this law as unconstitutional, but guess what? Our supreme court is a republican majority. And they are appointed for life, and there doesn't appear to be anyone retiring any time soon. I've always said my worst fear is to be imprisoned for something I didn't do, and now the government doesn't even need a reason to arrest us. It's just wrong.

Lastly, the bowling. Tonight we bowled the first place team in the league, and we sort of held our own. We won the first game, even though my brother bowled a 69 - no, that's not a typo - the rest of us had 200's, including my 240 and Eddie's 254. However, in the second and third games, Brian - on the other team - had a 277 and a 279. He finished with a 770, which is reDONKulous. I've never seen anyone get so close to an 800. I also had a 158 (ugh) and a 212. I finished with a 610, which is pretty awesome for me.

And finally, yes, I'm contradicting my last paragraph, I have a freaking cavity in a tooth. It sucks, and it makes my head hurt. It just came on today too. What the hell? I don't drink pop, I don't eat things with sugar for the most part, and I brush and floss. Ugh. I need to go to the dentist anyway, so I suppose this is a good reason to do it sooner.

Tomorrow, football picks.

I'm not fat, I just haven't grown into my body yet you skinny bitch.

Title courtesy of Eric Cartman.

If anyone is looking for a new bit to run on telemarketers, I suggest you listen to this.

Regardless, Friday's are for football.
Freaking Ravens. Actually, freakin' Steve McNair. I was this close to perfection. And like I said, I'll probably go 5-9 this week - especially if you see the schedule.
Home team in caps. Duh.

DALLAS over Houston
Drew Bledsoe sucks, and the Eagles proved it. But, the Texans aren't the Eagles.

Philadelphia over NEW ORLEANS
Man, tough one. The Saints look good at home, and Philly is coming off of a huge win, this could be a let down game, but I don't think so. I think the Eagles are eager to prove everyone wrong.

Seattle over ST. LOUIS
Another tough one, Shawn Alexander isn't playing this week, but he will be against the Vikings! That, and the Rams defense has been decent, with Seattle's O-line not so great. I think the Seahawks will win this one, barely.

ATLANTA over New York Giants
The Falcons have looked pretty good, and they're getting some of their defensive starters back this week. NY can't play right out of the gate, and I think Vick will be trouble for them.

WASHINGTON over Tennessee
I can't really pick Tennessee yet. Or, ever.

Buffalo over DETROIT
After watching the Lions piss away the lead last week against the Vikings, I put them in the Oakland and Tennessee echelon. I think McGahee will run all day against the Lions horrible D.

BALTIMORE over Carolina
Baltimore should redeem themselves at home, as their defense should be able to contain Steve Smith, or at least hurry Delhomme too much.

Cincinnati over TAMPA BAY
This will be another close one, as the Bucs are close, even with the Polish bricklayer quarterbacking. But I still think Cincy can figure out how to win better.

San Diego over SAN FRANCISCO
This could be a fantasy player's game, as they could roll up 55+ points. I like LDT running up and down against the 49ers and Philip Rivers showed us last week that he can throw the ball, pretty well in fact.

PITTSBURGH over Kansas City
Damon Huard as your quarterback can only last for so long. The Steelers have been embarrassed by their play the last few weeks. I think they're going to take it out on the Chiefs this week.

NEW YORK JETS over Miami
Now the Fins are going with Joey Harrington. Less mobile, more fragile than Culpepper. This should be good.

DENVER over Oakland
Boy am I glad I picked up Denver's defense this week. This could be the blowout game of the week, if not for...

Chicago over ARIZONA
Yes, it will be the national debut of the pink taco stadium, but Chicago, as much as it kills me, is awesome right now. The Cardinals will feel the wrath, and this could be another Seattle or Buffalo type game for the Bears.

There you have it.
Last week: 13-1
Season: 53-22

When i grow up, I want to be a principal or a caterpillar.

Before I get into my weekly bowling update, I just wanted to say a few things about the unfortunate plane crash yesterday in NY. I think just about all of us held our breath for a quick second when we first heard or saw what was going on. It didn't really feel like a terrorist attack, but the simple fact that that idea entered our minds shows us just what kind of world we live in today. To add to that, hearing that it was Cory Lidle, was just jaw-dropping. The guy just pitched on Sunday against the Tigers. I guess it's always a little more grounding when we witness an athlete, or a movie star, or anyone well known, die. We hold these people above us, whether we feel like we do or not, we really do; and when something like this happens, it really reminds us that we aren't invincible, and that we never know when our day will come. Please don't forget that someone else died yesterday in that crash, his name was Tyler Stanger. He was a flight instructor. No one has really said if he has family or not, but he was 26, three years older than I am. Cory left behind a wife and a 6 year old son. Please tell your children, and parents, and grandparents, and sisters, and brothers, and wives, and husbands, and friends, and anyone who means something to you, that you love them. We really don't know when we can be gone.

As far as the bowling goes, we won all 7 points tonight. The team we bowled had pretty much an identical average as ours, so it was a good test of equals. We smoked 'em. As for me, I had a 175, 180 and 181; so I remained consistent. Greg had a nice 276, and reliable Eddie had a 702. Which, if you don't know, is very difficult. Enough of that. Tomorrow, football picks.

Oh. Well, then just give me a six-pack and a couple of bags of Skittles.

How 'bout those Twins. I don't really feel angry towards them, as they really weren't expecting to make it to the playoffs, but after making such a late season comeback, I feel a little letdown seeing them swept out of the post season. But, there is hope loyal Twindom, as with the experience we have gained with the grind of the final half of the season, and the playoffs, we should be a better team next season, and favored to go to the World Series. That, and we'll be dumping the payrolls of BRadke, Carlos 'the Jackal' Silva, and possibly Rondell 'Ain't' White; along with losing the salaries of Bautista and Sierra . We could spring for a more defined power hitter to brace Morneau from the right side, and have an extremely deadly 3-7 in the lineup. Anyway, a better than expected season, and I'm expecting bigger things next year. Enough of that, how about the Vikings backing their way into the win yesterday? 2 defensive touchdowns needed to seal the victory, which brings the season tally to Offense: 4 - Defense: 3. I wonder if any team's defense has ever outscored its offense in touchdowns for a season. Should be interesting to watch.
I don't want to jinx it, but after yesterday, I am a perfect 13-0 for my football picks this week, and if Baltimore pulls it off, I will be perfect. Yeah, and next week I'll go 5-8.

What's the point of minin' for gold if I can't show the townspeople?

Another awesome video for your viewing pleasure. It's a video of the Bloodhound Gang (of Fire, Water, Burn fame) signing a song comprised entirely of Ralph Wiggum quotes.
If you want to know exactly what is being said CLICK HERE.

Anyway, on to what we've all come here to see: Hardcore Nudity! (Football)

New way to display picks - I will write ______ over ______. Instead of dealing with 2 different font changes, because that gets tiresome.

As always, home team is in caps.

St. Louis over GREEN BAY
Am I really ever supposed to be able to pick the Packers this season? As long as Brett FavRE is back there slinging prayers to Donald "Can't catch against Philly" Driver, I won't be picking them. Unless they play Oakland. Which they don't. 0-16 BABY!

NEW ORLEANS over Tampa Bay
Tampa Bay is starting a guy named Bruce Gradkowski this week, and for the rest of the year, because Chris Simms was de-spleened 2 weeks ago. Bruce Gradkowski sounds like a polish ironworker. Polish ironworkers don't have the hands of great quarterbacks. Besides, the Saints are at home, and everyone (the NFL) knows no one is supposed to beat the Saints in the Superdome this year.

INDIANAPOLIS over Tennessee
HA! Good luck Vince.

MINNESOTA over Detroilet
Sure, I'm being a homer, and I'm okay with that. But I don't see us losing to a team that is affectionately called "The Motor City Kitties" by their fans. I don't really know what to say that would be appropriate for all ages.

CHICAGO over Buffalo
Wow the Bears looked good against Seattle last week. Buffalo doesn't stand a chance in Chicago, especially when they barely beat the Vikings.

NEW YORK GIANTS over Washington
I think the Giants are too pissed about giving up 40+ 2 weeks ago against Seattle to succumb to anything Mark Brunell can throw at them. If he can throw! HA!

CAROLINA over Cleveland
Yeah, the Browstains beat Oakland last Sunday. Clap. That's like beating your Grandma at 1 on 1. Now that Steve Smith is back in action, look for Jake Delhomme to bust out this Sunday, because I'm starting him at QB on my fantasy team.

NEW ENGLAND over Miami
The Patriots absolutely embarrassed Cincinnati last week. Miami is the laughing stock of the AFC, mainly because we can't laugh at Oakland, just feel bad for them. Kind of like the kid that wore the hockey helmet in high school with "Phillip" taped to it. Yeah, you knew him, don't tell me you didn't. Anyway, look for Daunte to look like he's ready to own a sporting goods store on Sunday.

SAN FRANCISCO over Oakland (Phillip)
As a recap, Phil almost beat Cleveland last week. And that's some sort of major accomplishment for them, like missing the toilet seat for the first time when standing. But, they still don't know that they're supposed to put that toilet seat up. San Francisco was CREAMED last week by KC, but Phil's defense is a sieve.

Kansas City over ARIZONA
If only because Damon Huard looked decent last week, and their defense gave up 0 points to an okay offensive team, I need to pick Arizona because they are the 49ers south of the Mason-Dixon line. I believe Matt Leinart is starting this game, and he's ready, but I don't think he's this ready.

JACKSONVILLE over New York Jets
Jacksonville got it bad last week, to the Redskins nonetheless. I think they will bounce back at home this week to a decent Jets team, and give their fans hope that they won't implode every week.

PHILADELPHIA over Dallas
This one is tough, but I have to take Philly at home, considering they looked good last week against Green Bay, and there's an off chance that T.O. may leave the game because of a concussion. From a blow to the head. From a wrench of some type. Thrown by a fan. Philly fans have NO sympathy, especially for someone who sold them out. I mean, they booed Michael Irvin when he may have had a broken neck. Wow. Watch this game.

A WHALE'S VAGINA over Pittsburgh
I like the Chargers in this game, because they're at home, and Pittsburgh still isn't to form yet. Or maybe they are, and last year was sort of a mirage.

Baltimore over DENVER
Denver is all over the board, sloppy here, great there. You don't know what to expect. Well, expect that the Ravens' defense will show up, again, and they will be performing on national TV. I guarantee Ray Lewis will do some sort of crazy dance after being the 3rd guy to pile on a tackle, and act like he did it.

There you have it.
Last Week: 9-5
Season: 40-21

I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I ever recognize Missourah!

So, bowling went well tonight, we've been in kind of a rut, and tonight was some kind of progress. We bowled a top 5 team, and we took 4 points, narrowly missing on 5 by seven pins. The scoring was high, as we almost had 3000 pins as a team for the night, which is huge. I had another good night, 2 in a row for the first time in a long time, as I had a 169, 183 and a 224. All in all, I hope this means better things for the next few weeks.

The Twins play tomorrow at 3, and I think I'll be home, or close to home to watch it. This may be Brad Radke's last game, and I'd like to see him off, as he is probably one of the best Twins players in history. And don't try to argue it, the man has balls, big ones, and we will miss him.

Come back tomorrow, as I will be giving my football picks for the weekend, and possibly recapping the Twins game.

I bent my wookie.

The Twins sure bent their wookies. Man, I never thought we'd be down 2-0 after Santana pitched and we got to face Loaiza at home. I don't really know what to say, I'm so down about this. Hockey starts soon. The Wild look pretty good this year, I haven't ever followed hockey that closely, but I would like to probably start, especially with all the buzz around this year's team. Don't get me wrong, I'm not bailing on the Twins, yet, but they have had a total case of the ass-bats the past 2 days. I'm willing to bet it's because 7/10ths of our batting lineup hasn't had any playoff experience. I'm thinking that after this postseason, most of the guys will feel like they belong, and because of Detroit's fluke this year, and Chicago's aging, we'll be okay for next year, and maybe make a good run. Again, I'm NOT bailing on this team, but the way things are going, even if we do get out of the ALDS, I don't envision us containing the Yankees. God how I hate to say that. If there is anybody out there I wish failure on, it's them. Damn Yankees.

Right Lisa, some magical animal.

So, after I posted my last entry, I had an immediate comment, which you may have seen. Yeah, I am official, as I get SPAM in my postings. I changed the settings so you have to verify the word in your comment post for it to complete. Sorry for the hassle, but reading about Abercrombie and Fitch & all natural male enhancement isn't cool to me.

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Boy what a weekend. First the Twins beat the White Sux to have a chance at the American League Central, and then K.C. pulls off the unimaginable by sweeping the Tigers, in Detroit, to give us the league championship, home field advantage in the first round (possibly the second) and sends the Freakin' A's to the dome instead of having to go to New York to start out. Then, the Vikings look terrible by losing to a mediocre team by killing themselves with penalties, missed tackles and dropped passes. Perhaps mediocrity is the expectation for this team, not over achievement. And then, possibly the best thing this weekend, Steve and Janel had their baby, a girl, who they named Julianna Mae. She's adorable, and I know Steve's really excited.

Here are some pictures:

As far as sports go, with Philadelphia winning tonight, I went 9-5 for the weekend, not too bad, but I really missed the mark on the Cheifs -- Who would have thought Huard could be nearly perfect, let alone complete more than 10 passes? Jacksonville got really lazy against Washington, they should NOT have lost that game. Cinci laid down against New England, Ravens/Chargers was too close to call anyway, and the Vikes, well, you know.

MLB playoffs officially start at noon tomorrow. I will find a way to observe that game while at work, if I have to buy a radio subscription to MLB I will, but I am not missing these games. I think the Twinkies will win in 4, 3 if we get bat happy. Regardless, it's going to be an awesome baseball postseason.

Anyway, congratulations again Steve and Janel, I can't wait to watch her grow up.